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Saturday, December 20, 2003

Hey, guys. Sorry about dropping off the face of the earth. I'm not going to post those two notes right now, because my time is limited.

Update: I got booted out of the hospital on Wednesday night. The HMO came in and began harassing me throughout the day. They were pretty ugly. I ended up going to my in-laws (where I am now), because the hubby has had the puking/diarrhea bug. They have been taking good care of me.

Tapering the steroids is a little difficult. I feel pretty yucky as the levels go down. And from being on TPN for so long the ol' gastrointestinal tract kind of went dormant. It is having quite a time waking back up. Not helping at all is the cervical issue that keeps me mired to the bed. Can't digest anything or even poot when I’m lying down all day long. Ugh.

Good news: Yesterday we got the "fetal anatomy study" done. After all of these multiple drugs/treatments/ailments/etc., the baby is perfect in every way, praise God. Not only that but...


Thanks for all the prayers. Please keep them up.

Would like everyone to know that I had a glass of eggnog the other day! It wasn't as good as I remembered. Probably because I still feel like poop.

Overheard someone talking on phone: "We know what the baby is going to be. It's going to be a little girl."

How do we know "it's" going to be a little girl? Because we saw a little baby giney (labia, the works). Don't you kind of already have to be a girl to have a vagina? I mean, turnips don't have vaginas. She's not a turnip. The child is a child, is a girl, is a she, not an it. I know I’m defensive. I’m grappling with what happened and the humanity of gestating children. I feel like Charleton Heston trying to convince everyone that Soylent Green is people, and no one will listen.

But if you can hear me, I want you to know that what is in my womb is a human child, a baby. And the baby is a girl, our daughter, Elise, which means "God's oath." And furthermore, I am her mother, not her "mother-to-be." What is all this work I've been doing if not motherhood? I haven't just been sitting here with my finger up my butt, people. (That’s Dr. Keanu’s job.)

A girl...a GIRL!

All of this is miraculous. Every moment is God in action. He is alive and very well, and the music of my heart sings His name!

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